Here I am, right here, always
Things don’t change, not much
Life goes on pretty much the same
Oh yes, things happen, there are events
I go through them, and that’s it
Some events make me happy for the moment
Some events make me sad or nervous or angry
But they are just events and they pass
What I am is inside me
What I am is what I do
What I am is how I feel
And for today
I can say
I am OK
What is the future? A time yet to come full of events and people we don’t know anything about. Maybe its more of the same, maybe it will be something we can’t even imagine now. I think sometimes about what will take place next week or next month but I try not to think too far ahead… I’m busy enough living today lol. But really, would you want to know what is going to happen, good or bad, next year or 5 years from now. Would we be too anxious to get through this year and miss out on simple things if we thought next year looked better or would we get depressed and lose our will to live if the future looked bleak.
Personally I would not ever want to know the future. I believe we create it every day by the actions we take so how could anyone know for certain. One small choice could change everything. And that is the beauty of the future and not knowing it. If we feel we are on the wrong path we can make changes, make different choices, even small ones to change the direction we are going in. Am I saying I don’t believe in fate? I don’t know, maybe those changes we make are part of our destiny as well… stepping stones to getting where we are supposed to be. I don’t know, its one of things I could ponder for hours and never really come up with a concrete answer for myself.
I believe in planning to a certain extent, setting the events in motion to get you where you want to be. Some things, like an education, are long term and serve us for many years or even our entire life. Others are for the moment, or to get us through, like taking a dead-end job just to pay the bills. At this point in my life I feel I have made some right choices and some wrong ones along the way. But my present life is a result of my past choices and my future will be the result of my present choices. Alot of pressure really. Life takes alot of twists and turns and right now I am on a path with sharp bends and multiple forks. Will I choose right? Is there a wrong choice? Does it matter? It seems like things could go very differently depending on the decisions I make but in the end will it all turn out the same, or at least equally satisfactory? I am not going to worry about it. I will make the choices I feel are right at the time and have faith that everything will work out the way it is supposed to. Because if there is one thing I am certain of it is that the life I have lived has made me the person I am and I like me. No matter if I made mistakes, those mistakes have taught me lessons and made me strong. Its hard and sometimes painful to go through some of the things life throws at us but like they say ‘What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger’.